Love While You Can
by fanzel12
Summary: James and Idina act on their feelings for each other. Just a little story to satisfy the Jadina feels in my mind. "It's nothing you prepare for,it's nothing that you plan. But love when this world lets you, love while you can." (Rated M for Chapt.6)
1. Chapter 1

**AN: I don't know what influenced or led me to write this Idina Menzel/James Snyder (I obviously don't own them because their actual humans) fanfic, but here I am writing this Jadina fanfic. For the purposes of where I want this story to go (if I continue; you guys are about to become my bosses [if anyone even reads this] ) and how I want it to go, James is single and ready to mingle. ;) Enough with my ramblings. Enjoy the show…well, the story. Whatever.**

_I'm not even sure how to describe these past few months. My career has skyrocketed while my marriage reached an end that I thought I would never see nor did I ever want to see. Eight shows a week is a great distraction, but I would love to spend more time with Walker during this. It seems like bad always come with the good and I'm still learning how to deal with that. It isn't easy, but the cast and crew have—_

**Knock Knock**

_Speaking of my very supportive cast…_

"Ten minutes. You said you would be ready in ten minutes." James said playfully as he stuck his head inside the door.

Idina giggles and stands up from her chair. "Okay, okay. Just five more minutes. I'm just going to change really quickly."

James grabbed Idina's hand. "No, jeans are perfect." He led Idina out of her dressing room and to the car.

_I know it's crazy, but it seems like every time the cast goes out I find myself imagining that it's going to be just James and I. We usually ride together, but I always invite at least one other member to ride with us just so it's not obvious I would enjoy some alone time with James. He's been divorced and he understands what kind of headspace I'm in right now…plus he's pretty easy on the eyes._

Once they arrived to the restaurant, they got out and faced many camera flashes much to their chagrin. If a headline accused them of dating it certainly wouldn't be the first time and most likely wouldn't be the last. They quickly made their way inside and joined their cast mates who were seated and had already enjoyed a few glasses wine. Idina decided she would catch up and before she knew it she surpassed their few glasses before her food even came.

"Maybe a couple of us should slow down and have a round of water." Jenn said, laughing.

"A couple of us as in Idina and Tamika." LaChanze added. Everyone laughed and agreed.

After dinner, James insisted on riding with Idina to her apartment building and after seeing that she was indeed a little affected by the wine, decided to walk her inside and to her door. She had a little trouble, but once she finally got in she turned around. "Thanks you…Thank…" She cleared her throat before speaking again. "Thank you, James."

"No problem." James replied, trying to hold back a small chuckle.

Idina walked forward a little and gave James a hug, which he returned by innocently wrapping his arms around her. Soon Idina's hands slowly dropped a little lower until her index fingers found the two front belt loops of James' pants. She pulled him, pulling his waist into hers, without breaking their kiss. Her mouth opened, accepting James' tongue, and she moaned when she felt his excitement.

"Oh." James said, pulling away. "I um…We should…"

"I thought I was the drunk one." Idina said, giggling at James' lack of words. "Goodnight, James."

James returned the smile and waved, not making eye contact but just staring at Idina's gorgeous smile. He felt like a horny teenage guy and sure, he was two out of the three, but he wasn't sure that their kiss would or should lead to anything more. He watched as Idina closed the door and he stood there until he heard it lock.

He finally let out a deep sigh and walked away, oblivious of the fact that the tipsy brunette who had, just seconds ago, passionately kissed him was on the other side of that door, leaning on it, looking up at the ceiling with the biggest smile on her face and her heart beating a mile a minute.

The next morning was a headache. Literally. Idina woke up and dragged herself to the bathroom, undressed, and took a nice shower to wake herself up before calling Taye to talk to Walker and just hearing his voice immediately brightened her day.

"I miss you so much. Do you miss Mommy?"

"Yes. Nana Marcia is here. We played dinosaurs with Daddy and we put on a show."

"That sounds like so much fun." Idina said, trying to sound enthusiastic although her head was still feeling the after effects of last night's drinking.

"Mommy, SpongeBob is back on."

"You're ready to say goodbye now, aren't you?" Idina laughed and shook her head when Walker replied with a yes. "I'll talk to you later, okay? I love you so much, Walker."

"I love you, Mommy. Bye."

_The voice that belongs to most adorable little boy in the world, my heart, the reason I do anything good and beneficial, my motivation for every step forward that I have ever taken and will ever take. The divorce-in-progress has taken a toll on Walker, but it hasn't been anything too traumatic. He's gone through having Mommy on one side of the country and Daddy on the other, but it's different for him when we're both in the same city and not staying with each other. He's taken it like the champ he is and he understands that we love him no less and we still love each other. In all reality, memories of the past and looking into my son's face are the only things that remind me what love is._

As soon as she just sat in the quietness of her apartment, doing nothing, only the sounds of the city coming through the window, images of her being extremely forward with her very handsome cast mate and friend right outside the door of her apartment flooded her mind.

_What the fuck?_

She didn't know what came over her or why she chose that moment to act out a thought that she's had plenty of times off of stage and sometimes on stage when it wasn't a part of the show. Oh, she does remember what came over her…her several glasses of Cabernet Sauvignon. She knew she had to see him tonight, but she was already blushing at the thought of how embarrassed she would be if he brought it up.

_He pulled away so that must mean he doesn't look at me as more than a friend. But he was…physically excited…_

"So that must mean he enjoyed it." Idina sighed. "Great. Now I'm talking to myself."

She knew she had to see James, she knew it would be awkward, she knew that she made the first move last night and that she possibly tried to take things further, but she didn't want to have to deal with that before she went on stage. So she called James and he agreed to come over.

**Knock Knock**

_If I didn't know any better, I would swear even his knock is one of a kind._

Idina walked to the door and opened it up like she was a young girl who had invited her crush over for homework.

"Hi." she said as if she wasn't sure that was a proper greeting after having his tongue in her mouth the night before.

"Hi. How are you?"

"Great. Come in."

They both have a seat on the black sectional, Idina grabbing a red pillow and sitting it in her lap so she would have something to busy her hands with in case things got too awkward. She figured since she was the one who called him over that she should be the first to speak and explain exactly why he was called over.

A million explanations were going through her brain, but her mouth wasn't cooperating. And maybe that was a good thing because there was no telling what would come out.

"I was drunk last night." she blurted out before she knew it.

James let out a laugh that then made Idina laugh. He broke the ice without even trying.

"Were you really? I didn't notice." he joked.

Idina put the pillow to the side when she realized that she was talking to a really good friend who had managed to put a smile on her face plenty of times when no one else could.

"I just want to apologize for what I did last night, James."

"No need to apologize, Idina. It was just a kiss. Liz has never kissed me like that though."

Idina smiled. _Just a kiss? Yes. That's right I guess. It was just a kiss._

"Is something wrong?"

"No, no. I just didn't want things to be weird between us. I was drunk and it was just a kiss. _Drunk and just a kiss. That's all._ "That's all."

James nodded and got up. "Well, if that's all it was then…"

"What if it wasn't?" Idina hopped up and stepped back once she realized what she said. "It's crazy, but I had been thinking of doing that. Of kissing you." She chuckled, trying to relieve a little tension.

"It's not crazy. I enjoyed, but—"

"I know. That's all it was. It was just a kiss."

"That's not what I was going to say. I enjoyed it, but I've only gotten to know you as a friend. Before I kiss you more I should get to know you as more than a friend. Unless it was just a kiss for you."

Idina stood there with her mouth slightly opened, but no words were coming out.

"No. I would like to kiss more." Her eyes went wide once she realized what she said.

James laughed. "Okay. If you're not busy Monday night, I would love to take you on a date. Would you like to do that?"

_Holy fuck._ _Say yes, say yes. Go ahead, say it._ "Yes."

**AN: I hope you enjoyed it. Fave, follow, review, message me even. Give me input or an opinion and you will officially be my boss and you won't even have to pay me! Winning! Lol, really though I appreciate you taking your time to read this. Tell me what you want or what you think/ like/ don't like so far. Help me to help you!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Thanks to everyone who read my story! To those who reviewed, I appreciate you more than you'll ever know!**

_Monday night couldn't have gotten here any quicker! I feel like it was just yesterday that I agreed to this date with James and I am more nervous than I could have ever imagined. Spending time with him as a friend has always been fun and amazing, but tonight I'm wearing an outfit far from the usual sweats or jeans he's seen me in._

Idina stands in her bedroom, looking at herself in the mirror. She looks herself up and down from head to toe, individually assessing her appearance. Hair down and curly, bangs swept to the side perfectly, plain black strapless dress that showed ample cleavage and came just to the knee, and a pair of black Christian Louboutin peep toe pumps with their signature red bottoms.

She wanted to be simple but sexy. Underneath was a different story though; she just wanted to be sexy. She wore a brand new Tiffany blue strapless bra and a matching lace thong. She figured James wouldn't be seeing that tonight, but she wanted to take precautions just in case. She took ALL precautions. _Nothing like a good bikini wax to remind you that you're alive._

She gave herself a once over one more time before she was hit on the arm with a crayon.

"Walker."

"Sorry. My Indian shot his arrow."

She walked over to where Walker was sitting on the floor, playing with his toys. "How does Mommy look?" she asked.

"You look really pretty. Are we going somewhere?"

"I'm going to dinner. You're staying here with the sitter."

_This is my first date since the separation and I don't think I'm ready to talk about me dating with Walker. I don't think he really understands it. In his eyes Mommy would just be going out with someone who isn't Daddy._

Idina grabbed her red and black clutch and cellphone off of the bed before looking in the mirror one last time. _Do I need condoms?_

"Cond-" Idina's eyes quickly shot to Walker, who was still playing with his toys and hadn't heard what she said. She shook her head. "Okay, Walker. Give me a kiss."

He walked over as him mom bent forward and gave her a quick kiss on the lips.

"I love you and I want you to be good and go to sleep without giving the sitter any trouble."

The ride to James' apartment was nerve wracking. Idina couldn't stop her foot from fidgeting and she was constantly checking her phone to see if James texted to cancel. She was anxious from the moment she woke up this morning until the moment she knocked on his door. _We're not having sex. It's a first date and we work together. We're not having sex._

James opened the door. "We're not having sex." Idina said out loud. "Shit."

James laughed. "Good evening to you too."

"I'm sorry." Idina apologized before hugging James. "Hi."

"Come in."

Idina walked in and looked around as James closed the door. The lights were dimmed and it smelled amazing. They walked into the dining area and her eyes lit up when she saw champagne being chilled on the table and candles lit.

"James, this is beautiful."

"Thank you. And you look very amazing tonight."

"Thank you."

James pulled out her seat and she sat down slowly, letting him take a closer look at her from behind if he wanted to. And he wanted to. He was smiling as he walked to his chair and sat down.

"Whatever we're having smells great. Did you cook?"

"I did."

"You didn't have to go through all of this trouble just for me."

"I think otherwise. You deserve this and I know Walker's home so I wouldn't want you to leave him just for a burger or pizza."

Idina laughed.

After dinner, they went into the living room for dessert and wine. James gave Idina a light blanket so she could sit comfortably on the sectional next to him without having to worry about crossing her legs.

"I've tried not to drink so much. We wouldn't want a repeat of what happened at my place."

"Not while you're drunk at least." James said, making Idina smile like he's done what seems like a million times.

"When is Jacqueline bringing Oliver to visit?"

"Next week actually. Will Walker still be here?"

"The plan is for him to go back with Taye this Thursday. But things have been so hectic lately, it seems like nothing goes as planned."

"That's how it feels at first, but things calm down once you're used to it. This isn't what we planned, but life is life and it goes on." he said, smiling once he realized that Idina was staring into his eyes, hanging on every word he was saying.

"It's not easy to love people who have hurt us, but it's right." he continued. "We're dealt the cards and whether we think we're strong enough to move forward or not, it's what we have to do. We have to move forward."

"If I could pick anyone in the world to help me realize that, it would be you."

"I hope it would be."

Idina smiled and moved closer.

_Kiss me. Come on…just kiss me._

James leaned closer as if she spoke her desires out loud and placed his hand right behind her earlobe. He leaned even closer and finally…

"Could I kiss you?"

_Even better. _"Yes." Idina nodded.

Then they shared their first sober, James/Idina kiss and it was good. More than good. There was tongue and hands had minds of their own, pulling each other as close as they could get. Idina's blanket fell to the floor, but she didn't mind. James placed his right hand on her knee, glad to finally feel the soft skin that the blanket had been hiding.

Idina wanted nothing more than for James to peel her dress off and take in an eyeful of her new lingerie before removing them as well. That was Bad Idina on her right shoulder. Good Idina on her left shoulder knew that she shouldn't have sex with her friend on their first date no matter how bad she wanted it or how bad her body needed it. The more they kissed, the more Good Idina was disappearing.

A moan slipped out of her mouth and into James'. One she didn't mean to let out, but between the hot guy kissing her and trying to decide which Idina to listen to, she couldn't control the moan. Her hands wanted to unbutton James' shirt so that she could finally get one step closer to her body being satisfied in a way it hadn't been in months.

She chose to pull away before it got to that. She looked James in his eyes and smiled. He smiled back and that made him even more irresistible in her eyes.

"You're really good at that, you know?" she asked, knowing that he had to be aware of his spectacular kissing skills.

"So are you. Even better than when you're drunk." he said, licking his lips while mentally comparing the kisses and realizing they were both really amazing.

Idina laughed and picked the blanket up as she stood up. "I should get back home. I've had a really great night, James."

"Me too. So what now?"

"So you take me on more dates." she said while slipping back into her heels and grabbing her clutch.

"Sounds perfect." He stood up to walk her to the door.

"But first a kiss goodnight."

She kissed him, but this time took things just a step further than before. She grabbed James' hands and placed them on the small of her back, right above her backside. This time, he moaned, making Idina smile into the kiss. After it was over, she looked at him, biting her bottom lip.

"Thank you for a great night. I can walk myself out." Idina said as she looked down, also bringing James' attention to his body's reaction to the kissing that they had been doing. She gave him one more quick kiss before walking out.

Once she got into the hallway, she wanted to jump up and click her heels together, rejoice in her accomplishment. A few months ago, she couldn't even imagine looking at anyone other than Taye, but tonight she went on a date with James, she made out with him, he made her feel sexy and wanted. He made her feel like her life was actually going to be okay.

The next morning, Idina felt as if she were floating on air right there in her apartment. Walker woke her up early by sitting on her back and asking for pancakes. She covered his face in kisses, making him giggle, before going to the kitchen and making him breakfast. There was an unexpected knock at the door so she walked through the living room to answer it.

"Walker, your pancakes are on the table." she said before answering the door and looking around for the person who knocked.

She looked down and saw a bouquet of pink and white carnations and her face lit up even more if it were possible. She picked up the bouquet and closed the door right as her phone rang.

"Hello."

"Do you like them?" the very familiar voice asked.

"James, I love them. Thank you." she said, eyeing the flowers. "They're very beautiful."

"There's more where that came from if you let me take you out Friday. More than mediocre dinner at my place." he joked.

_Why do I get butterflies in my stomach when he talks? Why do I feel like flirting like some smitten teenager? It's not like we just met. Of course I've never known him in this capacity, I've never kissed him in our personal life, I've never let him run his hands all over my body. This is new and exciting and amazing…he's amazing._

"Idina?"

"Oh. Yeah, that sounds great." Idina snapped from her thoughts after hearing his voice. "You don't have to bribe me with flowers though and the dinner was far from mediocre."

"Mommy!" Walker called from the kitchen.

"Hey, could you hold on a second? I have another man vying for my attention."

James chuckled, knowing exactly who she was talking about. "You go ahead and take care of him. I'll talk to you later."

That night, things were different on stage. Kisses were just a little more sensual, lines were spoken fiercely as if they meant every word, songs were more passionate like they were talking to each other personally and no one was watching.

_Deep down I'm a coward, afraid to let you in. The only thing more frightening is to say what might have been. So here I go. Oh, here I go. _

Idina's adrenaline was at such a high. Once the show was over, she couldn't wait to get ready to do stagedoor and see everyone, she couldn't wait to get home and smother her sleeping Walker with kisses, and she couldn't wait for whatever James had in store for her Friday.

_I can't remember the last time I've looked forward to anything this much._

**AN: If there's something you would like to see happen with them, let me know. If there's something you don't like so far or definitely don't want to see, let me know that too. And follow me on Instagram and Twitter fanzel12 so you'll know when I update and you can give your input through messages and such. By the way, I LOVE U for reading this.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Again, thanks to everyone who's reading this and being so positive towards me. Every little follow, view, comment, 'like', and review isn't little to me at all. It actually means so much! So here…have some lovely Jadina.**

_James wouldn't tell me where I was meeting him or what we were going to be doing. He only told me not to dress up and gave me the address. When I got there and saw the sign above the building that read "Mud Sweat and Tears Pottery", I knew exactly what we were going to be doing. I couldn't help but smile. It was cliché and cute and I couldn't wait._

Idina walked inside and an employee took her to a section off to the side. She was happy to see James' face. He stood up as she walked over and wrapped his arms around her once she got to him. She returned his hug before finally speaking. "You're kidding me."

James laughed and replied. "We're going to be creative and leave here with new talents."

"We're going to leave here with bumpy, uneven pottery." Idina joked.

James could only agree and say that it was worth a try. The instructor came over and taught them the basics, most of which they laughed through because of all the mistakes they were making. Once they got the hang of it for the most part, the instructor left them to work on their pottery.

"I think yours looks better than mine already." Idina said half joking, half jealous.

"Well, if mine ends up looking better than yours, we could swap."

Idina smiled at the fact that he would even offer to appease her competitiveness.

"I think you're going a little too slow." James says as he gets up.

_Don't do it. Don't be cliché. You're going to do it, aren't you?_

James moved his stool behind Idina and laughed when he noticed her trying to hold back a smile. Idina turned to look at James. "Are Ghost reenactments a requirement here?" she asked.

"They're encouraged. So let me help you."

Idina turned back around, smiling from ear to ear when she felt James' arms reach from behind her and his hands softly land on hers. She could feel his chest move closer to her back. She looked around to make sure they had privacy before relaxing into him a little.

"Could you move your foot off of the pedal because honestly, you're not doing very good." he joked.

Idina laughed. "Oh really?" she said as she removed her foot from the pedal. "All yours, Mr. Professional Potter By Day, Broadway Star By Night."

"That's perfect. Could we maybe shorten it a little though?" he joked, returning the sarcasm.

Idina was stopped mid-laugh when she felt James' leg come from behind for him to put his foot on the pedal to spin the wheel. "Okay, let's see how much better I do with your help." she said, needing a distraction from the feeling of his thigh pressed against her hip. He pressed the pedal softly and the wheel began spinning, her hands underneath his being guided, smoothing the clay as it spun in slow circles.

He sped up a little before speaking. "See the difference the speed makes?"

"Mm-hm." Idina nodded, unable to speak after feeling his breath on the side of her neck.

_Is he as close to me as it seems? Here come the butterflies._

"You think you have the hang of it now?" James asked, breath still tickling Idina's neck.

"Nope." Idina said with a giggle, obviously lying just so James would stay behind her.

James was aware that she could do it alone, but to be honest he was comfortable right where he was and was hoping that would be her answer. Idina was hoping the instructor didn't come back anytime soon because she wasn't ready for this moment to be over, but she didn't need this getting out to the public.

"I have to admit that it does look just a little bit better." Idina said, laughing.

James laughed "Just a little bit, huh?"

Idina nodded, her nod slowing to a stop when she felt James' chin on her shoulder. It was like everything stopped and nothing else mattered. All of a sudden it was just the two of them, the sound of people coming in and out of the establishment, being greeted and led to another section of the place, didn't matter, and any pressure she felt to be perfect for James dissolved, anxiety about if things would work out or not faded away.

She didn't want to move an inch. She just wanted to sit there in that moment, enjoy the person she was with, enjoy the person she was becoming the more she realized that life would go on and that things would work out and be okay.

Just when Idina was impossibly getting more relaxed, loving the feel of James' hands on her hers, his leg wrapped around her, his head resting on her shoulder, the instructor came back. James sat up and leaned back from Idina a little.

"Mr. Snyder, your lunch is here and ready." the instructor said before leaving like she didn't see anything.

"You got lunch for us?" Idina turned and asked James.

"I figured we might get hungry from working so hard."

They got up from their seats, both of them a little disappointed about moving from that position. They got all cleaned up and walked to another room, talking about how their pottery ended up. "I think mine was a little beyond repair at that point. It—" Idina was stopped in the middle of the conversation once she opened up the door to what she assumed was a pottery classroom.

The pottery tables were set up in a circle and on each one of them sat a small bouquet of flowers, each bouquet different from the ones next to it. She looked back at James, who was smiling and was very happy to see Idina's reaction.

"I promised you flowers, didn't I?" James said, following Idina into the room and closing the door behind him.

"Yes. Yes, you did. They're gorgeous. This is really amazing." she said, admiring the way the floor in the middle of the circle of tables was set up in a picnic fashion. "You really don't have to go through this much trouble."

"It's no trouble. I just want you to enjoy yourself. You're busy and you've been through a lot of ups and downs this past year. I just want to help you relax and have fun. Anything you ever need, I'll be happy to give you."

Idina turned around and smiled at the handsome man she was now looking face to face. "I know. Thank you, James." She wrapped her arms around him and he did the same with her. Though it only lasted a few seconds, it felt like much longer. Neither of them complained about that though. They both enjoyed being in each other's arms.

After their date, the next time they saw each other was later that day at the theatre. Idina brought one of the bouquets from James to her dressing room. She took a picture of it and sent it to him.

_What am I doing? I have a son; I have a soon-to-be ex-husband. Why does this man make me feel like a lovesick teenage girl? Okay, maybe not lovesick. "Likesick" would be a better term. Very strong like. For the past few months, even with my busy schedule, all that's been on my mind is the divorce, what people are saying, how much I feel like Taye's moved on. Now I think about what the next time being with James will be like, what we'll do, what we'll talk about, when we'll actually be with each other…in _that_ way._

Her phone's vibration brought her from the type of thoughts that usually come when she thinks about where things are heading with James. She smiled and shook her head when she opened and read James' reply, which was a simple " ;)". As she was thinking of a response, there was a knock on her door and she knew exactly who it was.

"Come in." she said before James opened the door and peeked in really slowly, making Idina laugh.

"I just wanted to see the flowers again in person." he said as he came in and closed the door.

"That sounds like an excuse to me, but I'm not complaining" Idina said with a smile, standing up from her chair.

Her phone buzzed in her hand and she looked down to see Taye's name and a picture of Walker on her screen. She answered with a polite hello, trying not to sound as confused as she was. She had talked to Walker only a little while ago and wondered why Taye would be calling again so soon.

"Can you talk right now?" he asked.

"Is Walker okay?" Idina asked, the worst situations going through her head.

"He's fine. Can you talk right now?" Taye asked again, just as seriously as the first time.

"Wait a second." Idina answered, muting the phone and asking James to step out for a second.

She took a breath and tried to think of why Taye could be calling. They were amicable, but they never called each other about anything that was trivial or not about Walker. So she knew he wasn't calling about anything unimportant, he wasn't calling just to talk, and thankfully nothing was wrong with Walker.

She unmuted the phone and held it to her ear. "Okay. What do you need to talk about?"

"Why are people asking me if I've seen a blog about you and James?"

_I haven't told anyone anything about James and I. There's really nothing to tell._

"I don't know. I haven't seen anything and there's nothing for anyone to truthfully blog about."

"You didn't go anywhere with him today?" Taye said and cleared his throat, clearly unhappy.

Idina sat back down in her chair and let out a sigh.

**AN: I hope you enjoyed this chapter. I love getting feedback from you all, it really encourages me to keep writing. So continue to review, 'like', follow on Twitter and Instagram (Fanzel12) and comment or message me. If you have any ideas, let me know. And tell a friend to tell a friend to tell ANOTHER friend to check this out. I LOVE U!**


	4. Chapter 4

**I really appreciate everyone who's reading this and everyone who has commented, followed, reviewed, sent me a message, 'liked', or anything on here, Twitter, and/or Instagram. I honestly didn't think more than a few people, if that, would read it so…I LOVE U! Now back to your regularly scheduled program…well, your sporadically updated fanfic. Lol!**

"You didn't go anywhere with him today?" Taye said and cleared his throat, clearly unhappy.

Idina sat back down in her chair and let out a sigh.

_He asked that question like he knows something that I wasn't expecting him to know. Like I was his child who hadn't cleaned my room, but lied and said that I did. I felt like I was about to be scolded at any moment. I wasn't expecting to tell him about the couple of dates I went on with James. Not this soon._

"We went somewhere." Idina answered honestly but vaguely. "Why?"

"Because it's on the blogs, Dee." Taye said, obviously unsatisfied with Idina's response. "Not pictures, but someone saying you two were hugged up somewhere."

_I don't have to explain myself to him. I don't question him about the things I see in the blogs and tabloids about him, not since the separation. But he was the love of my life, the person I thought I would spend forever with, the father of my son so I want to keep things as harmonious as possible._

"Idina." Taye said a little louder than he had just been speaking, getting Idina's attention.

"It wasn't anything serious. He invited me to a pottery place and what the person saw was James helping me."

"Yeah. Has he been around Walker?"

"He's my friend. I work with him." Idina explained, not wanting Taye to get the wrong idea or to get upset.

"That's not what I asked."

"Yes, he has. Not since James and I have gone on a couple of dates though and Walker doesn't know about that."

"Well, neither did I. You didn't think that was something I should know?"

"Anything else?" Idina sighed, feeling like she was only digging a deeper hole for herself the more she talked. "Because I have to go."

"I think we need to talk about this more, but go ahead. We'll talk later."

"Give Walker a kiss for me." Idina said before she and Taye said their goodbyes and hung up.

Idina got up and opened the door, peeking out for James whose laugh she heard but she didn't see him. She wasn't even sure his laugh could put her in a better mood after her unfinished talk with Taye. She wanted to feel as happy as she did before she talked to Taye. When they were together, it was never like that. Taye's voice was what made her happy and now it was the thing that brought memories of the past and dampened her good moods.

As she started to close the door, James slid in with a smile on his face. He noticed that Idina was the opposite as she sat back down and he closed the door.

"Something wrong?" he asked, genuinely worried because she was smiling the last time he saw her, which was less than ten minutes ago.

"That was Taye." Idina said quietly, making James move closer to her. "Something about a blog saying someone saw us earlier. He's not happy about it."

"I'm sorry. That was my fault. I shouldn't have planned anything that was out."

"You didn't do anything wrong. We can't hide away in our apartments forever. It's just that I don't know how serious things are going to get between us and…I don't know."

Tears came to Idina's eyes as so many thoughts were running through her mind. She wasn't able to finish one thought without a totally different one starting. She didn't want to cry, but the more she held it back the more she felt it coming on.

"Idina, it's okay." James assured, kneeling down in front of her. "We don't have to know exactly where this is going, how long it's going to take to get there, anything. The only people we have to look out for are ourselves, my son, and your son. Anyone other than that isn't a number one priority."

_He's right. I have no clue where this is going; I just know that I want it to go somewhere. I want James to want that. I want us to be on the same page._

"Of course I do want whatever we're doing to go further." he said as if he read her mind. "But what's meant to be will happen and either way it goes, it won't be easy." he said, looking into Idina's eyes. "Might be a little worth it though." James joked, trying to lighten the mood.

_Here it comes._

Idina smiled.

She didn't know why she smiled. It could be because James was being so positive, it could be because he just said he wanted them to take things further, which meant that they were on the same page. It could be because just talking to him brings a smile to her face, simple as that. It wasn't easy to explain, but it felt amazing.

Idina leaned forward, putting her hands on the sides of James' face and putting her lips on his. He put one hand on her knee and one her hip and for the first time since Taye, she felt like she so perfectly fit with someone. She didn't want to move, but she knew anyone could interrupt at any time.

"I can't thank you enough, James." she whispered like she was telling a secret that was meant for just the two of them. Just a few minutes with James and her happy mood had returned. Not without any work on his part though. He said things that reminded her how much she was understood by him and unintentionally confirmed that they were on the same page.

That Sunday night, Idina and James planned on spending some time together before James' ex-wife brought their son and before Taye and Walker got to New York the next morning. After the show, Idina went home and started nodding off on the couch before she heard a knock at the door. She got up and answered the door, trying to smile but instead yawning.

"Should I come back another time?" James joked.

She grabbed his hand and pulled him. "No. Get in here." She laughed and closed the door behind them.

James sat down, wrapping his arm around Idina as she sat down to the right of him and laid her head between his shoulder and chest. It was quiet. The television was on, but the volume was so low that it may as well have been on mute. It was a comfortable quietness though. The kind where neither person felt the need to talk because just being together was good enough.

Although they were perfectly fine in the quietness, Idina remembered that they wouldn't be seeing each other tomorrow. The past few days had spoiled them, but tomorrow exes and children would be in town. She had questions, but she didn't want to seem jealous because she was far from it. But she also knew that James would never think that she was being envious.

"Is Jacqueline staying at a hotel?" she finally asked.

She thought she felt James nod his head, but she looked at him just to be sure.

"I guess that's really none of my business though." she said with a small chuckle.

"It is your business. There's no doubt that we're dating and that's something any dating person would want to know." he said, asking her a question without actually asking.

She caught on though. "Taye doesn't stay over when he's here. We think that would make things confusing for Walker. Well, more confusing than they already are for him."

She sighed and shook her head. She didn't like to focus on the negative ways the divorce could affect Walker. She felt like she was put on this earth to love and protect Walker and make him happy. The divorce would do neither of those things.

"I feel like I failed him." she said out loud, meaning to only think it.

"You didn't. For Walker to be happy and have a great life, you have to first make sure you're happy. If you're not happy, then you're not giving him your very best." James explained. "He deserves your best."

"You're so perfect." Idina said, looking up at James and smiling.

James laughed. "I'm not. I've just been through it and I've felt like a failure, but I just had to learn that if I wasn't happy with how things were and neither was Jacqueline, then we couldn't be great parents."

"She's missing out on a really great man." she said, not necessarily talking to James but just thinking out loud again.

James took his left hand and placed it on Idina's chin, tilting it up so that he could kiss her. Idina smiled, waiting for his lips to touch hers, but before it happened she felt James' left hand grab her right one, intertwining their fingers and placing their hands in his lap.

Then he kissed her. And she realized that their time together only gets better and better and so do their kisses. Her hand always felt good inside of his and she never got tired of that feeling. She couldn't fathom ever getting tired of being so close to him.

She didn't want to stop any time soon. Honestly she wanted to put her hand on his thigh and slowly move it upward, but she knew tonight of all nights wasn't the best time. The thought of it made her smile into the kiss though. Her smile was obviously contagious because it made James grin too.

"What are you smiling about?" he asked.

"You." she answered simply so they could get back to what they were doing.

**I hope you liked this chapter. I scanned through it on my phone instead of proof reading so hopefully there aren't many mistakes if any at all. As always, if you have any ideas or anything you would like to see, let me know. I randomly update this so let me know if I should change that and do it once a week, twice a week, etc. Also follow me on Twitter and IG (Fanzel12) to stay updated. Also…I can't think of anything else so that's all, folks!**


	5. Chapter 5

**I really can't thank you guys enough for reading this and actually being excited for updates. It makes me push through procrastination. Lol! Just a heads up: I have no idea how much longer this is going to last. I have no plan; I just let the words flow on the day I write a chapter. Also I was thinking about writing a smut chapter, but I would feel responsible for younger people reading it although younger people these days do more than I've ever done in a bedroom because all I've done is sleep in beds, but we're not talking about me right now. Lol! Anyway, I may do that. I have to give it some more thought. **

_I don't know if I'm ready for this. I guess I have no chance, but still I'm just not ready. I don't want to feel like I'm being reprimanded, I don't want Taye to act hypocritical like it's okay for him to date but not for me to date. Maybe if I have positive thoughts, things will be just fine._

A knock at the door pulled her from her thoughts so she got up and opened the door, so excited to see the most amazing person in the world.

"Mommy!" Walker exclaimed. "I came back to New York fast this time."

"Because I missed you so much." she said, picking Walker up and giving him a kiss. "How much did you miss me?"

"A whole lot." he answered as he wrapped his arms around Idina's neck.

Taye walked in and closed the door behind him.

"Could you go to your room while Mommy and Daddy talk?" she asked, putting Walker back onto the floor.

Walker nodded his head and went to his room.

"Have a seat."

They both sat down and the tension was thick. The two of them knew that it shouldn't be like that, that they were supposed to be each other's friend so this should be easy. It wasn't though. It was tough to have the conversation because they really did still care about each other's feelings and neither wanted to hurt the other, whether it be intentionally or by accident.

"I should have told you that James and I were starting to date." Idina admitted. "We were together for a long time and we have Walker and I should have given you that respect. I honestly never wanted you to find out the way that you did. I'm sorry that it happened that way."

"You think that makes it better?"

"I just said that it wasn't okay for you to find out from other people. I apologized. I don't know what else I can do." she said, feeling herself get a little emotional, but trying to hold it in.

"Idina, I don't think you understand how I felt finding out something on the internet that I should have heard from your mouth."

"Oh, I am highly aware of how that feels. Let's not go there, Taye."

He shook his head. "Have you had Walker around him?"

"I told you yes, but not since we started dating." she answered. "Maybe you're acting like this because you don't want to see me with someone else, but you should have thought about that while we were married."

"What does that mean?"

She only sighed in response, trying not to let her emotions get the best of her. She wasn't happy with the way Taye was acting in the least, but she still thought enough of him to respect him and not argue. More than that, their son was in his room and the last thing she wanted was for him to hear them. It got quiet.

Ready for the conversation to be over with, Idina finally spoke.

"Truthfully, Taye, I feel like the things that you think are okay for you to do, the same doesn't apply to me. It's hypocritical and it hurts." She shrugged her shoulders, tears forming in her eyes.

Taye moved to sit beside Idina and that made things worse. A tear escaped and she slowly shook her head, confused as to why she was flooded with these feelings that she couldn't even identify.

"I'm sorry it hurts, Dee, and I'm sorry if I overreacted. That's just not something I wanted to find out from anyone other than you and having the first thought running through my mind being my son spending time with you and another man." he explained.

"I understand, but I can't stop my life because we're not together while you get to move on. Being Walker's mom is my main concern at all times no matter what, but I'm not just Walker's mom." Idina said, wiping away the few tears that were running down her face.

"I get what you're saying and I promise I didn't mean to hurt you. I'm sorry. Come here." he said, putting his hand on Idina's back.

She leaned into his hug and returned it. She was reluctant at first, but it really did make her feel better. She felt like she got something off of her chest because since the separation, she never told him about any of her feelings about the way he acted towards her now.

"I really am sorry, Dee." he said when he finally removed his arms from around her.

She nodded her head, feeling relieved that the conversation was had, happy that there wasn't much conflict, and pleased that they came to a peaceful understanding. Walker came back into the living room and climbed into Idina's lap.

"You really did miss Mommy, huh?" she looked down and asked him.

Seeing him look up at her, smiling and nodding his head, really did take her happiness over the top. He needed them to work together and communicate well with each other in order for things to be cohesive. He needed that and she thought about how she would do whatever she needed to do to make him happy, prompting her to smother him in kisses.

He laughed and tried to squirm away, but she wrapped her arms around him and continued.

"Kiss attack Daddy." he said through his laughter.

"Walker. You know Mommy and Daddy don't kiss anymore." Idina said, heart breaking as she sat back and looked at Walker.

"But I want Daddy to play kiss attack with us."

Taye stepped in after seeing that Idina wasn't okay with disappointing Walker. "Buddy, how about you go put your shoes back on and me, you, and Mommy can go somewhere and have some fun. Anywhere you want."

Walker smiled before jumping out of Idina's lap and going back to his room. Idina could only feel at fault for not being able to give Walker the parents he's used to, parents who love each other in every way possible. But she gathered the emotions that were swirling around inside of her and put them to the side while she had an amazing day spending time with Taye and Walker.

Nothing in the world made her happier than waking up the next morning with Walker asleep in her bed beside her. But nothing made her sadder than having to kiss him goodbye so he could go back with his dad. In the middle of her sulking about Walker leaving, she a got an exciting call and a little later, a knock that she was even more excited to hear.

She got up and answered the door, immediately wrapping her arms around James, and giving him a kiss when she felt his arms around her.

"Is it Friday yet?" she asked.

James laughed. "No. I'm not all yours just yet. Just a little break while the popular kid has a play date at a friend of Jacqueline's."

"Well, I'm happy to see you." she said as she grabbed his hand and led him inside, then closing the door.

"How did it go yesterday?" James asked her, sitting down and loving the feeling of having Idina in his arms again.

"I talked with Taye and he seemed okay with us once we discussed it a little. Walker wanted us to kiss though."

James looked down at Idina.

"We didn't." she said, shaking her head and laughing.

"Well, in that case I'm glad things worked out." James replied with a smile.

"I'm glad that you could come by after you dropped Oliver off. It wasn't easy saying goodbye to Walker again so soon."

"I'll be the same way once this weekend gets here."

She knew Oliver was first in James' life just like Walker was in hers, but it felt nice that he would come to spend a little time with her. She would never expect James to spend every minute possible with her while his son was in town, she would never even want that. But she did like that he showed her today that she does have a place in his life. That felt good.

That Friday, they had both had a busy day and were both a little exhausted, but they knew if they wanted things to work out they would have to make time for each other. So they had planned to go out to dinner or for drinks that night. Once Idina got dressed, she definitely wasn't in the mood for dinner or drinks; she was in the mood for something else though. Something she tried to shake from her mind.

_It's too soon for that. But if there's a set time for it to happen, it wouldn't be special. I'm horny, yes, but that's not the only reason I'm ready. I just am. I'm ready to be closer with James and I think he's ready too. What man wouldn't be ready? James isn't the type to rush me and he hasn't. I'm just ready._

Thoughts of tonight's possibilities were only getting her more hot and bothered as she looked herself up and down in her bedroom mirror, waiting for James to get there. She tried breathing deeply to get herself together, but that didn't work. The sudden knock at the door made her jump just slightly. She went to answer it and seeing James only brought more heat.

"Nice. But are you going barefoot?" James asked.

"I was actually thinking maybe we could stay in. I'm not really in the mood to go out."

"That's fine. I understand." he said as he stepped inside the apartment and closed the door.

Idina instantly grabbed the sides of his face, bringing their lips together and kissing James, hard. She softened their kiss once she felt his hands on her waist. It didn't cross her mind to stop at all. She knew this was okay and she knew she wanted it and would never regret it. She pulled away a little, still keeping their lips at a very close distance.

"Let's go to my room." she said, half suggesting, half commanding.

She grabbed his hand and they went into her bedroom. They were barely inside when their mouths reconnected. Hands doing much more than usual and it felt wonderful. They gradually moved closer to the bed, James' hands roaming down Idina's back until they reached the bottom of her rounded backside. He squeezed it in a needy way, making Idina tremble with arousal.

He made eye contact with her, making sure this was something she wanted before they went any further. She smiled at him and attempted to convey her every feeling and every thought into a deep kiss, telling him that she wanted this. And she wanted it badly.

**AN: So the next chapter will either be the morning after this or what actually happens in the bedroom. Let me know which one it should be. Thanks again for everything, you guys! You really are amazing and you're the only reason I keep this going. Questions or comments? Just let me know. I LOVE U!**


	6. Chapter 6

**WARNING: This chapter contains sex. I already feel really guilty about writing this type of thing about this lovely, amazing woman and her ultra handsome co-star, but I like to get out of my comfort zone and challenge myself. So if you're not interested in the smut, just skip this chapter. Also if you are under 18…I don't know. Just make good decisions. Here we go…**

James slowly unzipped Idina's dress, his fingers caressing her arms as he pulled the straps down. She stepped out of the dress as soon as it hit the ground and she felt like the next thing she was going to step out of was her skin. She felt like she was about to burst with anticipation.

He put his hands on her hips, taking a minute to look at her. Every thought imaginable ran through his mind as his eyes went back and forth between the red demi bra with black lace and the matching panties. He couldn't decide which he wanted to take off first or if it would be more appropriate if he let her remove them herself.

Idina reconnected their lips in a passionate kiss, reassuring him that she wanted this to happen. His hands slipped behind her, moving upward until he met the back of her bra. He nimbly unlatched the hooks, not even taking it off before he let his hands start moving to the front. Once his hands reached their destination, Idina slipped her bra off, letting James enjoy her body in its full glory.

His kisses started moving down her neck while his hands were busy on her breasts. She put her hand on the back of his neck and pulled him into another searing kiss. Her breasts suddenly became unbothered when James started to unbutton his shirt. She helped him remove it once he was done, eager to finally feel his skin on hers in such an intimate way.

And that's exactly what she felt when he pressed his chest into hers, running his hands all over her upper body, looking forward to moving them lower. He placed his hand on the small of her back, pulling her lower body into his. It was like a wave came crashing over her and she couldn't unbutton his pants fast enough.

He slipped out of them, leaving him in only his t-shirt, which was quickly removed, and his boxers. Idina sat down on the foot of the bed, gradually moving towards the head of it. James followed her every move, his tongue in her mouth not missing a beat. He moved down a little, making her miss his mouth being on hers until she felt it on her collarbone, sucking as if her skin had a deliciously distinct taste. His hand was going back and forth between stroking her right breast and playing with the lace waistband of her thong.

She didn't think the moment could get any better, but she was proved wrong when James' mouth joined his hand on her breast. Once he'd had his fill, he moved to her other breast, taking her nipple into his mouth and flicking his tongue across it over and over again before sucking it. Idina's moans were urging him on even further. He eased his fingers into the waistband of her thong while kissing down her body.

After he slipped her thong off and threw it to the floor, he moved back up her body and kissed her. It had been far too long since Idina's body had experienced this type of situation, but it seemed to feel even better than she remembered. He moved lower, making sure to give her breasts a little more attention before continuing his journey down her body.

Once James reached his destination between Idina's legs, he put his arm under her thigh and placed his hand on her hip, broadly licking between her wet folds. He didn't think it was possible, but he grew harder at the taste of her. Her salacious moans also had a little something to do with that. He felt her hand on the back of his head, encouraging him on. She groaned as he sucked on her bundle of nerves and ran his tongue across it repeatedly.

She felt like was coming undone and it surely would have happened had she kept hearing James audibly enjoying her. She reached down, putting her hand on his cheek to get his attention. He climbed back up her body and kissed her deeply. She tasted herself on his tongue and it turned her on even more.

"You were too good at that." she murmured, smiling.

He smiled back. "That's possible?"

Idina moved over a little, grabbing a condom out of the top drawer of the nightstand, and shifted back to her previous spot on the bed.

"If you want me to last more than a few minutes, yes." she replied, playfully snatching the condom back when he tried to grab it. She gently pushed him to lie down beside her and opened the condom, tossing the empty wrapper to the floor. They smiled at each other as she leaned closer and closer until their lips met. While Idina's lips were working up top, her hand was about to get to work down below.

She placed the condom on the head of James' penis, squeezing the tip before sliding it down his shaft. Her kiss matched her hand, slow and enjoyable. When she reached the base, she straddled him, biting her lip when she saw the look in his eyes as he watched her get on top of him. She reached down, taking his warm member in her hand before raising her hips and placing him at her slick entrance.

She slowly eased herself down, taking him inside her at a slow and steady pace. When he was halfway inside of her heat, she leaned over and nipped at his earlobe, letting him hear her gasps as she continued to lower herself onto him completely.

"Fuck." she panted almost inaudibly.

Idina placed her forehead against James', looking into his eyes as he firmly gripped her slowly undulating hips. He couldn't resist kissing her when she sped up as she got accustomed to having him inside of her. His head dipped and he started kissing and softly sucking on her neck, trying not to be rough enough to leave a mark no matter how bad he wanted to.

Idina brought her upper body back up. She liked that she was on top and in control, that she could look down and see his face expressing the amount of physical pleasure she was giving him. She fanned her fingers over his chest as she rode him. He moved one of his hands to a luscious breast and began playing with its hardened nipple.

She closed her eyes and involuntarily let out a loud moan, not expecting it to be so satisfying and not expecting to be so comfortable with him. James moved the hand that was on her hip to one cheek of her curvy bottom, gripping it, making Idina arch and feel him pressing against different spots inside of her. She opened her eyes so she could look at him, but he wasn't looking at her. He was gazing at the place where their bodies met, where he was moving in and out of her.

He made her feel so sexy and that made her want to be sexy for him. She brought her hand to her mouth, wetting her fingers with her tongue, and then bringing them down to where James was focusing, and started massaging her clit all while looking at him. His gaze moved up her body until it met her face and he felt himself nearing explosion.

With her hand still rubbing her sensitive clit, she leaned down and kissed him more fervently than ever before. She began sucking on his tongue when it entered her mouth. It wasn't very much longer before Idina began to feel shockwaves as James moved inside of her more rapidly. She sat upright once more, riding out her orgasm and feeling herself tighten around James, then throbbing as she started coming down from her high.

James wasn't letting up though and he attempted to prolong her orgasm, knowing his was approaching. He rolled them over, keeping himself inside of Idina's pulsating center, his hips jerking against hers. She wrapped her legs around his waist and bit his shoulder, keeping herself from screaming.

The more James heard Idina pleasurably crying out, the more erratic his strokes got. With an animalistic groan, he stilled and came while still inside of her. There was only the sound of them both panting as he shakily pulled out of her and rolled onto his back.

She instantly missed them being connected as they laid there, both donning a minor sheen of sweat. She felt herself starting to become self-conscious so she started to kiss him to keep her mind off of the fact that she was so exposed in every sense of the word to a man who wasn't the man she had been with for many years. She never wanted the moment to end with this man though. Fortunately, that was only the beginning of a very enjoyable night for both of them.

**AN: And that concludes this chapter. I felt so dirty writing about Idina and James in that way, but I tried to stay as reserved as my inner freak would let me. I feel really weird now that I've realized I just wrote about two actual people having sex. Lol! I should probably Google ways to clean my mind's gutter now. Until next time, guys. I LOVE U!**


	7. Chapter 7

**AN: Can't thank you all enough for all of the things you do and say! And I especially can't thank you enough for taking time to even read this fanfic and giving it a chance. Because without readers, writing this would be…pointless to say the least. And as I stated, here's Chapter 7 a day earlier than planned because you all are freaking awesome!**

The next morning, Idina woke up in the arms of a sleeping James so she let him sleep while she showered and prepared breakfast. She felt the feeling that she felt the morning after their first date except she felt as though the air she was floating on was ten times higher. She thought she heard James moving around in her bathroom and soon he came into the kitchen wearing only his boxers and a really big grin.

"Good morning." she greeted him before giving him a kiss. "Breakfast menu is any cereal of your choice."

James looked at the boxes of cereal sitting on the counter and laughed.

"I could fix it for you if you'd like."

"I think I can manage." he joked, eyeing the boxes of cereal.

Out of the corner of his eye, he could see her looking at him and smiling, but he didn't say anything. He liked it. And she liked that he didn't mind her not cooking breakfast. She liked everything about the idea of them being an "us", being together, and things being very serious.

"You don't have to stop staring or anything, but I could use some milk." James said.

Idina rolled her eyes and laughed, grabbing the milk from the fridge and sitting on the counter in front of James.

"I hope this doesn't change things with us." she said as she placed her elbows on the counter, then sitting her chin in her hands, her fingers resting on her cheeks.

"What? The milk?"

"I'm serious. I was worried that it might be too soon for us to have sex and that things would change."

He leaned on the counter, face to face with Idina.

"Nothing's changed." He kissed her. "Nothing's going to." He kissed her again.

Idina smiled, placing a hand on his face and keeping her lips on his.

"Do I have a check out time?"

She shook her head. "Not unless you want one."

"Nope. I suddenly have a taste for something and it's not cereal." he said, walking around the counter. He stood behind Idina and put his hands on her hips, kissing the side of her neck.

She turned around to face James, smirking. "Yeah?"

James did nothing but nod his head. Before he could kiss her, her phone rang.

She sighed. "One second."

She squeezed between James and the counter, picking her phone up and unlocking it. It was a text reminding her of a meeting she had to be at in less than a couple of hours.

_Shit._

"I'm sorry, James, but I forgot I have a meeting in just a little bit."

"I guess it's my check out time." he said, a laugh breaking his serious pout.

Idina laughed and grabbed his hand. "I'll make it up to you somehow. I promise."

She let him enjoy some cereal while she got ready. She tried to rush through getting ready so she could have breakfast with him and he tried to rush through breakfast so he could watch her get ready. It resulted in both of them quickly finishing what they were doing and having no time to do anything more than cuddle a little and kiss each other goodbye.

After every moment with James, Idina was on a cloud. Of course not literally, but it felt that way. She wanted to tell the world, shout it from the rooftop, and all the other cliché things people felt when they were falling for someone.

_I'm not falling. Falling is close to being love and it can't be that. Is there a place between like and love? Maybe that's where I am. I don't know, but it feels so good. Last night only made these feelings grow and maybe it's too soon for feelings to grow. But then again, you can never put time limits on things like this…whatever _this_ is. I don't even know what this is! Okay, breathe._

_We're together, we're dating, and we're now having sex. I assume we're boyfriend and girlfriend…but the adult version. Those titles sound so juvenile and while James does make me feel like a young girl with butterflies and lust, I'm not a young girl. I'm a mom, I was a wife, and boyfriend and girlfriend just doesn't sound like someone my age and with my experience._

Over the next few weeks, a decision was brought up, discussed several times, and finally made. It was a decision to take the next step forward. Albeit a nerve-wracking decision, it was also a special and important one. Idina got up that morning and got ready before James came over, trying not to let her nervousness get the best of her.

Once James got to her apartment and they got settled on the couch, half of the nervousness disappeared only for the possibility of regret to settle into its place.

"Are you sure you agree that we're ready for this?" she finally asked.

"Whatever you think is best is what I agree with." James said with a smile, trying to calm Idina.

"Is it ever a right time? If I was to wait six months down the line to tell him and he hates it and is really upset, then the past six months would just be a waste of time."

James sighed. "I hope he's not upset."

"Me too. But I just want you to know I couldn't keep doing this if it really hurt him. Maybe he's not ready for this to happen. I don't want to force this into his life." Idina explained.

"Well, we've both agreed that our expectation is to be together for a really long time."

"I know. I just want nothing more than I want him to be happy. That's the most—" Idina started, but was interrupted by a knock at the door.

She thought her heart was about to jump out of her chest. Then she heard that sweet voice from the other side of the door, calling out for her to open it, and it calmed her heart. James laughed, now getting a little nervous himself. He sat up straight, mentally preparing himself for the conversation that was about to take place.

Idina opened the door with a smile on her face. "Did you rush me to open the door?"

"Uh…because I missed you." Walker said, looking back and forth between Idina and Taye.

"Good excuse." Taye said, giving Walker a high five and laughing.

Idina laughed and shook her head. No matter what happened with Taye, she had to love and respect him as Walker's father. He had given her the greatest years of her life and the best person in this world. If they never did anything else right together, they had Walker and there was nothing greater that could be accomplished.

"How are you, Taye?" she asked, picking Walker up.

"I'm good."

They stepped inside and Idina closed the door, holding on tight to Walker to keep her mind from wandering into negative territory.

"Walker, you remember my friend James." she said, sitting on the couch on the opposite side as James.

"How are you, buddy?"

"Okay." Walker answered, laying his head on Idina's shoulder.

"He wasn't in the mood to travel today. How are you, man?" Taye said before he shook James' hand and sat down.

"Good, man. Nothing to complain about." James answered.

Idina was glad that they were being cordial and they seemed okay with one another, but that wasn't her concern at the moment.

Sitting Walker up in her lap, she looked at him. "Walker, you understand that Mommy and Daddy aren't together anymore, right?"

Walker nodded his head.

"You still want us to be happy?"

"Yes." Walker answered.

"Well, you make us very happy. We love you so much. But James makes Mommy happy too."

Walker seemed to be thinking a bit before he spoke. "You love James so much too?"

"I have feelings for him, yes." Idina answered, trying to keep things simple and not awkward.

"You're going to marry him like you married Daddy?"

Idina nervously laughed, knowing she shouldn't have expected any less from her honest and inquisitive child. "I don't know, Walker."

Walker only nodded his head.

"Are you upset or are you okay with it? You can tell me." Idina asked, actually a little afraid of what his answer would be.

"I'm okay. I like him and you said you're happy and I like when you smile." Walker answered, unintentionally putting a smile on everyone's face. "But are you sad, Daddy?"

Taye laughed. "No, Walker, I'm not sad. You and Mommy are my family and always will be. When you two are happy, so am I."

Walker looked at Idina and smiled. "Daddy's not sad so okay." He then turned to James and said "So you can love Mommy if you want."

"Thanks for the permission, buddy." James said, laughing.

Idina sighed in relief, realizing that she was worried for nothing. She knew she had the most amazing son and he would understand as much as a child his age could. He understood how much being happy meant and what a wonderful feeling it was. And even at his young age, he knew that he liked it when his mom was happy. He could tell when she wasn't.

With this conversation out of the way, Idina could let her feelings blossom without having any worry or guilt lurking in the back of her mind. Of course she would have to sit down with just Taye and James at some point in case adult topics had to be discussed. But all that mattered at the moment was that her son wanted to see her happy.

"Do you kiss James, Mommy?" Walker asked.

Idina laughed. "The only person I'm worried about kissing is you." she said, grabbing his face and kissed his forehead. Idina looked into Walker's eyes and really soaked in what James told her about how her happiness was imperative if she wanted to give Walker her best.

Walker smiled, put his hands on Idina's cheeks, and returned the forehead kiss.

**AN: I hope you all enjoyed this chapter. I planned on writing it Thursday and posting it Friday, but because you guys did a favor for me and read a fellow writer's fanfic, I'm writing it today (Wednesday) and posting it Thursday. I have two funerals to go to on Saturday so I'm not sure when I'll write and post the next chapter. I'll let you guys know on Twitter/Instagram (Fanzel12) I LOVE U!**


	8. Chapter 8

**AN: I'm so, so sorry about taking so long to update. My excuse is a mix between me being lazy, me not having any ideas about what to write about next, and me being busy. Hopefully once I write this chapter, ideas will start flowing again. So thanks for your patience and continued support. I hope you enjoy this chapter in which I have no clue what is going to happen. Anyway…I LOVE U!**

James going to Idina's dressing room after every show became routine to the both of them. They liked to spend as much time together as they could and although they shared a stage eight times a week, their alone time is what meant the most to them. Because they had a lot of things going on it was always like they couldn't be together soon enough or long enough.

After every show for the past few weeks, they shared a hug and a quick kiss as soon as they stepped off of the stage. Sometimes their fellow cast mates reacted and sometimes they just let them have their moment. Tonight's kiss definitely got a reaction. As soon as they weren't on that stage, they were just James and Idina, and it didn't get any better than that.

James usually came to her dressing room right after she was finished dressing and ready for stage door. Sometimes he came before she was finished dressing and caused her to be a little later for stage door than she usually is. Tonight's kiss let her know that it was going to be one of those times. And boy, did she enjoy those kinds of nights.

Although she felt awkward when she sometimes caught a glimpse of Walker's pictures during, James was a wonderful distraction from that. As much as she felt immature having sex in her dressing room, she knew that once her adrenaline rush was gone, the only thing she would want to do is sleep.

"Could you put some clothes on before I open this door, please?" Idina said, laughing while pulling her shirt on over her head.

James smiled, lying on the couch in just his boxers. "I'm pretty comfortable how I am."

"Seriously. The last thing we need is anyone seeing you in here like that."

"You sure that's the last thing we need? Did we need anyone hearing you? You were a little loud tonight." James said, laughing because it was a true statement.

Idina walked closer and leaned down to face James.

"Because it was so good tonight." she said before she kissed him. "Now put your clothes on."

James sat up and grabbed his jeans and shirt off of the floor and started getting dressed.

"Jacqueline and Oliver are coming this week, right?" Idina asked, looking in the mirror while pulling her hair up into a bun.

"Yeah. In a few days."

"So…"

"So?" James asked, confused about what Idina wasn't saying.

"So do I get to see them?"

"I don't know. I don't know if that's a good idea."

Idina turned and looked at James and he felt like he was in trouble.

"You don't know? She knows about us, doesn't she?"

"Well, yeah." James said, standing up and pulling his jeans on. "I just don't know if she wants Oliver around us."

"I'm sure a one year old is going to have a really big problem with us." Idina said sarcastically, laughing.

James nervously chuckled. "I know, but I just don't know how Jacqueline would feel about it."

Idina rolled her eyes and turned away. Then James really felt like he was in trouble and felt like he should fix whatever was wrong before it got worse. He walked over to Idina and stood behind her. She turned around and faced him, looking less than amused.

"What?"

"Are you upset with me for some reason?" James asked.

"For some reason? James, I told Walker about us. It's not even like Oliver could understand."

"I'm just saying that it's not my decision alone."

"Did you ask Jacqueline about meeting me?" Idina asked, looking straight into James' eyes.

"No." James said as he looked away. "But I will if that's what you want."

"You don't want that?"

"Idina, that's not what I'm saying." James tried to explain, but that's as far as he got before he realized that the more he was talking, the worse things were getting. "This is just as serious as things have gotten for me since the divorce."

"I'm in the same position. Do you think introducing my son and ex to the person I'm dating was my dream come true in a perfect world? It wasn't, but I did it because I want us to keep taking steps forward."

"I want us to keep moving forward, I do. I just have to talk to Jacqueline about it."

"If you wanted me to meet them, you would have taken the initiative. If that's really what you wanted." Idina said, slipping into her shoes before heading towards the door of her dressing room.

"Are you still coming over tonight?" James asked right as Idina's hand grabbed the doorknob.

She turned around. "No." she deadpanned.

"We should talk about this."

"I don't think there's anything else to talk about." she said, walking out and closing the door after her.

No matter how many fans she talked to, or autographs she signed, behind her smile was utter annoyance. She didn't know why she felt so strongly about whatever just happened, but she did. She kind of felt like she wasn't as special to him as he always told her. And even after she got home, the thoughts wouldn't go away.

_Fucking great. Just fucking great. I let my guard down and I listened to all the sweet things he said like a teenage idiot. I got swept up in the romantic things and having someone holding me and the sex…the sex is amazing. But if he doesn't want things to get more serious, then this is just a waste of time and I've obviously wasted enough of my life. Starting over right now was taking a chance and I thought James was the perfect person to start over with, but maybe I was wrong._

After Idina's thoughts settled so did she. She was finally getting comfortably on the couch and was enjoying the silence. It didn't last long though because there was a knock at the door. Although unexpected, she knew who it was, but she wasn't in any mood to be sweet and she didn't even want to give him the smallest satisfaction of her knowing it was him.

"Who is it?" she asked, walking towards the door.

"It's me."

She stood there for a few seconds, getting herself together. She was upset with him and as much as she hated it, his voice still made her a little weak. Not as much as it usually did, but her heart experienced a tiny flutter when she heard him. She was used to opening the door and greeting him with a kiss. This time she only unlocked it and walked away.

He must have heard the door unlock because he opened it and came in. He closed the door and followed Idina and sat on the opposite side of the couch to give her some space. They both just sat there, James keeping his eyes on Idina, but not getting a look or anything in return until she was ready to say something.

"I'm really tired, James." she said, sighing after.

"Well, let's talk about this and move on."

"Talk about it if you need to."

James tried to ignore her attitude. "I don't understand what the big deal is and I think you're taking it much more serious than it is."

"Don't dismiss my feelings. I think that you really mean I'm taking us much more serious than we are. And that's fine if you feel that way. But if you don't want things to get serious, then we should stop now."

"I don't want us to stop and we are serious so no, I don't think that you're-"

"Clearly I'm not important enough to meet your son and your ex-wife. Obviously we're not serious enough for that although I showed you how serious I was weeks ago."

"Is that what you think?" James asked, scooting closer to Idina. "You think I don't find you important enough?"

She didn't answer; she didn't even look at him, but he knew her answer.

"That's not what it is, Idina, I promise. You're very important and you're very special to me."

"That's what you say, that's what you tell me, that's how your actions usually make me feel, but not this time. I feel very insignificant and like you don't think I'm important enough to meet them."

"I can assure you I do not feel like that and I'm sorry that I'm making you feel that way. It's not that I don't want to take things further. I just don't want anything to go wrong. Not knowing how Jacqueline with feel about it, not knowing how things will turn out scares me."

She finally looked at him and for the first time since earlier that night, no sign of anger or irritation was on her face.

"That's my own fear getting in the way." James continued. "I like to know what I'm in for. And with you, I know what I want, but there's no guarantee when it comes to these types of things. I'm sorry, okay?"

Idina nodded her head and let him wrap his arms around her. Although she still wasn't completely over it, it felt good to be in his arms. She pulled away and he could tell that she was still upset because if she wasn't, he would still be holding her.

She stood up before speaking. "Is that all?"

James was a little confused. He didn't know where they were at that point. Was this their first argument, was it still going on, was she pissed, did she believe his apology and explanation?

"I guess that's it." James answered after a silent pause. He stood up and walked to the door with Idina close behind. "I'll see you tomorrow."

"Okay." she replied, simply.

He opened the door, and then turned to hug her one more time. She kept one hand on the door and lightly hugged him with one arm. James didn't feel good leaving with things feeling unresolved, but she obviously needed her space and time to think about the things that were said. She closed the door once he was on the other side and realized that tonight was surely going to be the worst night she'd had since they started dating.

**AN: Aww, I did not expect this to be a much less than happy chapter, but as I said I had no plan of where this was going. I hope you enjoyed nonetheless and no worries, my friends, things will be okay in Jadina Fantasy World…Kingdom…Palace…Place…Castle…and stuff. Lol! Now, that I've gotten back into writing, I feel my creative juices flowing. But they will probably stop again if I take a break. Anyway, follow me on Twitter and IG (Fanzel12) and don't forget to review, comment, like, fave, and such. Until next time….**


	9. Chapter 9

**AN: Once again, thank you guys so much for reading, reviewing, following, messaging, and anything else. You're all so amazing and sweet; every single one of you! And I appreciate you so much! Now, I'll stop being sappy and start writing. Heads up, I transferred to a university for my third year of college and I start in exactly a week and I'm not prepared at all so I may be a little busy in the upcoming weeks. Just know that I LOVE U!**

The past two days weren't easy. James and Idina hardly talked and instead of real feelings sweeping over her on stage, it took all she had inside of her to pretend to be happy with him. There were no kisses after the show, but James still went to Idina's dressing room after she was finished getting changed. She didn't acknowledge him and she hated how persistent he was…but she loved how persistent he was.

As much as she hated having him around like nothing had changed, she loved that he was putting forth effort. But that didn't fix everything, that didn't change how she felt. Jacqueline and Oliver were coming into town the next morning and James hadn't said anything about them since the first night they spoke about it.

Idina felt like he was trying to brush everything under the rug and every time she thought about the situation, it only made her angrier. She didn't know if her feelings were justified or if James was telling the truth when he said that she was making this more serious than it really was. Once that thought was in her head, she couldn't concentrate on anything else.

_Maybe I was wrong. Maybe it's not a big deal. Maybe I was exaggerating the situation._

Tears came to her eyes. She didn't want to mess up what she had with James over something so minute, something that could have been worked out quickly had she just talked without getting an attitude and without ignoring James. To her surprise, there was a knock at the door and she didn't hesitate getting up and answering it.

She opened the door and immediately wrapped her arms around James, who was shocked at the action but accepted it anyway. He thought he heard her say sorry under her breath and he only put one hand on her lower back and one hand on the side of her face, titling it up towards his own.

"I'm sorry." Idina repeated, looking straight into James' eyes, sincerity as clear as day evident in her eyes.

"I understand." he replied before pressing his lips against hers.

They both missed it tremendously as if their lips hadn't touched in months. Idina lead James inside and this time they bypassed the couch and went to her bedroom. They both sat on her bed, Idina not letting get of James' hand at all.

"James, when I was with Taye, I turned a blind eye to things. I always told myself to get over things and I always ignored my gut feelings." Idina started to explain and she could already feel the tears coming. "I tolerated things and I pushed my feelings to the side so my husband and our child could be happy."

"I'm not him. I would never want you to do that with me. Any problem you see, I want us to address it head on before feelings worsen."

"I know that and I don't want to punish you for what happened with him. It's just hard not to think about that and see it as a cautionary tale."

"That won't be us. I'm glad that you brought up me not asking you to meet Jacqueline and Oliver. I wasn't manning up and that was my fault, my fear."

"I just don't want to do anything to run you away or…I don't know." Idina said, tears forming in her eyes.

James smiled. "Idina, there is nothing you could ever do to run me away. I hate that you even think something like that, but I will spend every day proving you wrong if that's what it's going to take."

Idina laughed and shook her head. "I really am sorry. I should have just talked it out with you instead of ignoring you. That certainly didn't make things any better. It actually just made me feel like an ass because you kept trying despite my attitude."

"That's what I'll always do. I want to be around you no matter how you feel or whether you're upset with me or not. I just want to be around you all the time. Including tomorrow."

"You want me to meet them?" Idina asked, her face brightening and her mouth widening with a smile.

James answered with a grin and a nod.

"I don't want you to do this just because I was pissed."

"That's not why. I just came to my senses and realized that when I've got someone as good as you, I better do everything in my power to keep you. And not only do I want to keep you, I want to keep you happy."

"You do." Idina said before leaning closer to James and kissing him. With her lips still touching his, she spoke before she could stop herself. "I love—" She abruptly stopped and looked at him and quickly looked away.

_Fuck._

Idina let go of James' hand and slowly fell back onto her bed, landing on her back with her eyes focused on the ceiling. Her lips were tightly pressed together and her face was turning redder as seconds passed.

James lightly laughed. "Are you okay?" he asked Idina, smiling.

She only shook her head.

"Idina, if you didn't want me to hear whatever you were about to say, I didn't hear it."

"You obviously did hear it."

"I didn't. I have no clue what you're talking about. What day is it, where am I?" James asked, trying to act serious, but a smile kept coming through.

She looked at him and tried to shoot him a very stern glare, but it was broken with loud laughter. James leaned over on his elbow, resting his head on his fist, taking in the most amazing sight.

"I got caught up in the moment." Idina explained, sitting up and mimicking James' position on the bed.

"I have no idea what you're talking about, but I'm sure when you're ready you'll tell me whatever this mystery thing is that has you acting so weird."

Idina rolled her eyes and kissed James as he lied on his back. As soon as she felt James' hand going down her back and pulling her closer to him, she pulled away.

"We're not having sex the night before I meet your son and ex-wife."

"Am I being punished for something?" James asked, half joking, half serious.

"No, I just want to get my rest and make sure I'm at my best."

"You don't have to impress Oliver." James joked.

Idina laughed. "I know that. I'm not trying to impress anyone, but I don't want to be tired. I need for my days off to be wonderful especially tomorrow."

"Okay, fine. I'll suffer for another night."

"I promise you'll survive." Idina said, giving James one more kiss before departing from the bed much to James' distaste. "Okay, you should go."

"Why am I being punished?" James asked, laughing and getting up from the bed, following Idina to the front door.

"I need rest, you need rest, and I learned in my teen days that lying in bed is only temptation." she said as she opened the door. "But thank you for coming over and I really am sorry about the way I was acting."

"You don't have to apologize for the way you feel or anything else about you. Ever."

Idina gave him another kiss, just a chaste one although she was tempted to give him more. "I'll see you tomorrow?"

"You bet." James answered as he was walking out of the door.

Idina closed it behind him to keep herself from grabbing his hand and taking him back to her bedroom like she was really wanted to do. It's not like she was going to get any sleep with her nervousness aflame about tomorrow. But there was another thing that was going to run through her mind all night.

"_I love you"? What was I thinking? I obviously wasn't thinking because if I was, I wouldn't have said something I didn't mean. Or maybe I did mean it, but I definitely still wouldn't have said it. I don't know if that's how I really feel and more importantly, I don't know if that's how James feels. But then again, he said that there's nothing I could do that would run him away. _

_I'm sure I just feel like I love him because let's be honest, we've had a thing for each other way before we started dating. But it's too soon for love._

_I do not love…I don't love…Damn it, I love him._

**Question of the Chapter: Have you ever felt like you loved someone, but didn't tell them? And for what reason didn't you tell them? (if you want to share that) And do you think Idina should tell James or keep it to herself for a while? Comment your answers on my IG, tweet them to me, put them in the review, message me, whatever! I LOVE U!**

**AN: Confession: I actually have no clue how long they've even been dating because once I write and post, I don't read my own work because I'm sure I would find a million things I could have done better. But anyway, I hope you enjoyed this chapter!**


	10. Chapter 10

**AN: As always, I don't know for sure what's going to happen in this chapter and I feel like I should end this fanfic since I'm about to start school tomorrow, but I don't know how to end it therefore I can't. Because I refuse to just stop it abruptly. Enough with my problems, I hope you enjoy the chapter.**

*****WARNING: This ended up being quite steamy at the end so if you don't want to read any smut, the line of asterisks will indicate when it really starts*****

"Am I dressed okay?" Idina asked while looking down at her simple black and white striped shirt, jeans, and black sandals.

James looked her up and down as they stood in the elevator, pretending to evaluate her outfit just to satisfy her. "You look perfect."

"You're just saying that." Idina sighed, making James laugh.

"Why do you ask me things like that and you never believe my answer?"

"This is very important and I just want to make sure I'm properly dressed."

"It doesn't matter what you wear. You're you and that's enough. Either she likes you or she doesn't." James said, thinking it would make Idina feel better and then realizing it only made it worse.

"Wait. You think she might not like me? Maybe I shouldn't-"

She was interrupted with a kiss from James, which she wasn't going to return, but she felt a hand gripping at her waist and she couldn't resist. But the kiss did its job. It shut her up and it calmed her down.

She pulled away when she felt the elevator stop. "I hate when you do that, you know? I know it just means you want me to hush and that's your way of making me do it."

"Oh, you've discovered my secret weapon." James joked and laughed. "I have been found out."

They stepped out after the doors of the elevator opened and instantly joined hands when Idina took a deep breath. Right as James was about to knock on the door, Idina stopped him.

"Don't be nervous. There's nothing to be nervous about."

Idina nodded and kissed James quickly. "Okay."

James knocked on the door and they both giggled at the sound of a babbling child on the other side of the door.

A pretty brunette answered the door with an absolutely adorable child on her hip.

"Hey, kid." James exclaimed with a huge smile on his face as he reached out for Oliver.

Oliver clapped and jumped from Jacqueline's arms into James'.

Idina was smiling, already enjoying seeing James interact with his son. She knew from the way he got when he talked about Oliver that this is the way it would be with them. And she loved witnessing it.

"Come in." Jacqueline said, bringing Idina's nerves back a little and reminding her that Oliver wasn't the only one she was meeting today.

James and Idina went inside and sat beside one another on the sofa while Jacqueline closed the door and took a seat on the loveseat. Things were quiet other than James and Oliver being playful and enjoying each other as if they were the only ones in the room before Oliver calmed down and rested his head on James' chest.

"It's nice to meet you, Jacqueline." Idina finally said, taking both Jacqueline and James by surprise.

"Oh, I guess I should have introduced you two." James said, laughing.

"I know who she is. It's nice to meet you too, Idina." Jacqueline said, with a small but polite smile. "James didn't tell me that you would be coming over until yesterday."

"Yeah. It wasn't something we really planned on happening until yesterday."

"Aren't you still married?" Jacqueline asked and now Idina was the one taken by surprise.

"No. Well, we're not together, we're separated."

"So yes, you're still married? Has your husband met James?"

"Taye has met James." Idina answered, starting to feel beyond uncomfortable.

"So you two must be pretty serious if he met your husband."

"You can call my ex Taye. That's his name." Idina said and she tried her best not to have an attitude because she still wanted to make a good first impression.

"Jacqueline, stop." James said.

She didn't say anything after that so Idina took the opportunity to play with Oliver while he was lying on James' chest. He was bright-eyed and smiley with her unlike his mother. He seemed to like her and that definitely made her feel better.

"So are you two very serious?"

"We are." James answered.

"Does your son stay with you, Idina?"

Idina was disappointed to have a question directed at her because she honestly wanted the conversation to be done.

"Yes, but he's with his dad right now." Idina reluctantly answered.

"You're only separated. Is there a reason you two haven't filed for divorce yet? Like you two might get back together?" Jacqueline asked as she cocked her head to the side and smirked.

"Is this an interview?" Idina asked, trying to laugh to keep from getting angry.

"Kind of." Jacqueline answered with a hint of attitude.

"Alright, Jacqueline, that's enough."

"I only asked a question." Jacqueline tried to explain.

"No, you're kind of being disrespectful to her, to both us of really."

"James, I wasn't disrespectful. You're out of line."

"No, you're out of line. We're in a relationship and we're serious and I love her and you have to respect that."

Idina looked at James, but tried not to look too stunned because she wanted to keep her poker face up in front of Jacqueline.

"Love her? It's serious enough that you love her?" Jacqueline asked with a mix of anger, shock, and, aggravation evident on her face and in her voice.

"I do. And if you don't have anything appropriate to talk about then we can go."

Idina looked at James and he looked really calm for someone who wasn't very calm. He was taking up for her, but he wasn't disrespectful towards his ex-wife. If he didn't have his child sleeping in his lap, Idina would've easily been turned on.

"Where's Oliver's bag?" James asked, standing up and walking to the door with Idina following behind him.

Jacqueline got up and handed the bag to James before kissing Oliver's forehead.

"We'll be back in a little while." James said before opening the door and letting Idina walk out first and then he closed the door behind him.

"James, I really appreciate that." Idina said, grabbing James' hand. "And maybe I love you too."

"Really? I had no clue. I am so surprised." James laughed and kissed her even though she rolled her eyes and shook her head at his sarcasm.

They held hands in the car all the way to James' apartment while Oliver was in the backseat, napping in his carseat. Idina tried to keep herself from smiling because to anyone else it would be random. To her though, it was because she was truly happy that James felt the same way as she did and it didn't hurt that he wasn't afraid to tell his ex.

After they got to James' apartment, he and Idina cuddled on the couch while Oliver continued his nap in James' bedroom.

"Do you really love me?" Idina asked.

"How many times are you going to ask that?" James asked, laughing.

"I just want you to be sure."

"Well, I know I'm sure. Do you know if you're sure?"

Idina smiled. "I'm really sure." she answered, laying her hand on James' chest. "So sure."

That's the last thing she remembered happening before James fell asleep and so did she. She woke up to a small hand on her cheek and she heard James laughing. She sat up on the couch.

"I had to have a little help waking you up." James said.

Idina's laugh was interrupted with yawn. "Thank you for helping your poor dad, Oliver." she said, picking Oliver up. "He's so adorable, James."

"Do you see all of this?" James, asked, gesturing at himself and making Idina laugh.

"You're ridiculous." Idina said through her laughter.

Oliver laughed like he knew what was going on and that made Idina and James laugh even harder. Idina wasn't okay with the way things happened with her and Jacqueline, but it was amazing spending time with James and Oliver. More than anything, this moment made her think of Walker.

"We should probably get him back. Jacqueline has plans and her friends want to see him." James said, taking Oliver into his arms.

"I probably shouldn't go. You can drop me off before you go." Idina suggested as she got up from the couch and started to put her sandals back on.

"Idina, I don't want you to think she hates you or-"

"Thanks for putting that in my head." Idina said sarcastically as she stood up and laughed. "I'm kidding. Even though she went about it the wrong way, I understand. She only wants what's best for you and Oliver. As a mother, I get that."

James smiled about Idina being so understanding and calm about the way Jacqueline acted.

"But let me be clear. As the woman you're dating, I hate it. It's not something I would ever be okay with dealing with, but I like the way you came to my defense. And if Oliver weren't here…" Idina leaned towards James and whispered in his ear.

A big grin slowly appeared on James' face, making Idina laugh as she walked to the front door and opened it.

"Are your feet working?" she asked, pulling James from his daze. "Let's go. I don't want her to think I've kidnapped you two."

After Idina and James took Oliver back to Jacqueline, they made their way back to James' apartment. The whole ride back, James kept throwing glances towards Idina and she was aware of what he wanted.

"You think I was serious about what I said I would do if Oliver weren't with us?" Idina asked, laughing.

"I'm just saying that you wouldn't do anything with me last night and tomorrow night, you'll be tired. So we should seize the day." James said, pulling into his apartment's parking garage.

"Seize the day, huh?" she asked, leaning over the console and taking James' earlobe into her mouth.

She rested her hand on his chest as her tongue continued its work.

"You decide to seize the day while we're in a moving vehicle?"

"I'm seizing the moment." she said as both of her hands met at the front of James' pants, undoing the button and unzipping them, one hand slipping down underneath his underwear, gripping his warmth, which was growing hard.

James didn't care where he parked; he just knew that he shouldn't be operating anything at the moment. He pulled into the nearest parking spot, immediately bringing Idina's face to his, connecting their lips in a passionate kiss as her hand slowly stroked up and down his length, occasionally swiping her thumb across the tip.

The radio was off and they could only hear their moans and she could feel the head of his penis start to get wet with pre-cum. As much as she didn't want to leave his lips, she had plans for bigger and better things. She slowly disconnected their mouths and looked into James' eyes.

He tugged his pants down just a little as she pulled his dick out and swiftly attached her mouth to it and let her hand continue to move up and down. She moved her hand out of the way and stuck her tongue out, letting it land at the base and slowly and deliberately licked upwards.

She licked the pre-cum from James' head and took it into her mouth. Feeling James' hands tangled in her hair, she slowly took him into her mouth, inch by inch. She felt his hips bucking and put her knees in the seat and sped up, her mouth and hand moving in time with one another.

"God." he mumbled through his moans.

Idina could feel herself getting more and more turned on the more she heard James moaning. While his left hand had a firm grip on her hair, his right hand moved to her back before it moved down to her ass.

She raised her head slightly, taking a chance to look at James' flushed face before taking him back into her mouth. Pleasuring him was almost as good as sex to her; she thought she enjoyed it even more than him until she heard the sounds he made when he was about to cum.

He never wanted to thrust himself into her mouth so he tried to stop his hips from jerking towards her. After a few more minutes of her mouth and hand working furiously, she felt his release inside of her mouth.

"Shit!" James exclaimed much louder than he intended to.

Idina removed him from her mouth, swallowing the contents of his orgasm and licking what was left on him. She sat up, watching James catch his breath, and smiled at how undone she made him become.

"Let's finish this inside." she said, wiping the corner of her mouth.

As soon as they stepped through the door of James' apartment, he told Idina that he saw her laughing at him in the parking garage. As payback, he caused her to become just as undone over…and over…and over again.

**AN: Woo-hoo! Another chapter down! I got an idea for IF I stop writing this particular story. IF I stop and IF you guys agree, I'll start doing oneshots. Which will go like this: you guys DM me on Twitter or message me on IG and give me a scenario, what you want to see a chapter about, or anything like that, and I'll try to bring your idea to life. That's IF I stop 'Love While You Can'. I LOVE U!**


	11. Chapter 11

**AN: Well, you guys said that I should keep writing so I guess that means I have to keep writing this story. Lol! So I'll try to update at least once a week while I'm still getting settled into my class schedule. So…here's a new chapter for you! **

James woke up to a vacant side of the bed, confused until he saw Idina standing there getting dressed.

"Where are you going?" he asked, sleepiness dripping from his voice.

"Home. Where else would I be going?" she answered, laughing.

"Why don't you ever stay the night?" James asked as he sat up and let out a yawn.

Idina pulled her shirt over her head before she answered. "I just want to get home to Skype with Walker a little bit when he gets into bed."

"You could do that here."

"I want to be home when I do it though. You understand."

"I don't, but it's okay I guess." he said, sighing.

Idina sat on the bed and leaned closer to James, sensing the change in atmosphere. "I don't see what the big deal is. I'll stay one night when I get the chance."

"You've had plenty of chances." James responded. "If you don't want to stay over, I would just rather you tell me that instead of making excuses."

James could tell from the look on Idina's face that she was very dissatisfied with his comment.

"Excuses? You think I make excuses just so I won't have to stay the night?" she asked in defense mode.

"Honestly? Yes. Some nights it's because you want to talk to Walker, other nights it's because you're tired and only want to be in your bed." James explained.

"Goodbye, James." Idina quietly said before getting up from the bed and leaving the bedroom.

James hopped out of the bed, catching Idina as she was headed for the front door. He softly grabbed her arm to get her attention because the last thing he wanted to do was go through more arguing all because things weren't talked out as soon as possible.

"I didn't mean anything by that. I just feel like you find reasons not to stay over." James explained as he took a hold of Idina's hand and they sat on the couch. "I just want more than anything for you to be honest with me and not hold your thoughts and feelings inside."

Idina sighed and calmed down before speaking. "We're in a grey area and I don't know how to feel about it. I don't like sleeping over because of that."

"What?" James asked, confused because Idina wasn't being very clear or specific.

"I don't know. We know we love each other and we know that we want to be together for a long, long time. I think about us moving in together a lot, but I know it's too soon for that. In between those two things is a grey area and that's where we are."

It was quiet.

"Now that I say it out loud, maybe I was just overthinking things and being emotional." Idina admitted.

A smile was growing on James' face because she just said what he was thinking as if she read his mind.

"Don't laugh at me." Idina said, playfully hitting James' arm and laughing.

"I'm not laughing at you. I'm laughing at…" James started a lie that he couldn't finish.

"You're laughing at me!" Idina exclaimed, laughing even harder.

They loved moments like this. When they're together, there's always laughter. And more often than not, it's rolling around, tearful eyes laughter. When it died down, they looked each other in their eyes and knew so well that this was right. And whether it was right for just now and lasted forever, it didn't matter. All that mattered is that right now, they loved each other so much and they were willing to work at being together for a long time.

"I have an interview really early in the morning so I should go." Idina said with a smile still left on her face from the laughing. "And that's not an excuse." she said, standing up and letting out a small chuckle.

James stood up after her and walked her to the door before making a realization as Idina was putting her shoes on.

"Wait. Where were you storming off to with no shoes on and no car here?" he said, laughing.

"Oh, be quiet. I was too upset for shoes." she joked.

After James took Idina home and walked her into her apartment, they kissed each other goodbye. After he left, Idina sat on the couch and wondered if she would ever get tired of hearing James tell her that he loves her. She didn't want to get tired of it and she didn't think she ever would.

She didn't have much time to think right now though; she had to be up early the next morning so she needed her rest. The next morning was a typical busy morning with trying to get ready, call Walker, and get her mind and thoughts in order before the interview. Her mind obviously had intentions of its own though because the interview didn't go as expected.

That night, Idina sat in her dressing room after the show and before stagedoor, thinking about that morning's interview and the effects that may occur as a result of it. Right before she reached wits end, James walked through the door and gave her a kiss on the cheek.

"Great show." he told her as he always does before he took a seat on the couch. "How did things go this morning?"

Idina was hesitant to answer so she just shrugged her shoulders. She should've known better though because she knew that James could always tell when she was keeping something to herself or when something was bothering her. Even before they started dating, he felt things from her that no one else could.

"It didn't go well?" James asked.

"I guess it did. Just a question came up that I wasn't quite prepared for, and I didn't have much time to think before I answered." Idina started explaining. "I was asked about you. I didn't want to lie and make you feel like what we have isn't important, but I didn't want to divulge any information without talking to you about it first."

"So what did you say about us?"

"That we're dating and that our families, exes, and children knew. And I said that, that was all I wanted to say about it. I wasn't expecting to be asked about us so I'm sorry if you didn't want—"

"Idina, calm down." James said with a smile on his face. "It's fine. People were going to find out someday."

"I don't know when the interview will air yet, but when it does, everyone will have an opinion whether it's good or bad."

"Doesn't that happen with everything? Everyone has an opinion about everything, right? So you shouldn't be nervous, anxious, or bothered about what people are going to say. Ignore it if it's negative and focus on it if it's positive. And focus on your happiness. Are you happy?"

Idina looked at the man she loved and couldn't hold back the giant smile that appeared. "Yes, I'm happy." she said as she walked over to James, grabbing his hand and pulling him to his feet.

He let his hand rest on her hips as he kissed her. And as their lips moved together, Idina thought about how much she loved how he could take her from a pile of nervousness and make her happy and calm. No one's ever been able to do that quite like James and she loved every minute of it. She loved every minute with him. Even when they're arguing because she knows that after they argue, making up happens and it's always a reminder of how good what they have is.

"So when it airs, let people say what they want. We know what we have and that's all that matters." James whispered in Idina's ear.

When he said things like that, it didn't feel like he was whispering into her ear. It felt like he was whispering into her heart. And as cliché as it was, she never wanted those moments to end.

**AN: Finally, huh? Sorry it took so long to get this chapter out and sorry it's a little shorter than usual. I woke up this morning and wrote it because I procrastinated all day yesterday. Hopefully, I can set a day to start updating once a week and actually stay on schedule with it. Let's cross our fingers, lol! Thanks for being patient guys! Until next time…I LOVE U!**


	12. Chapter 12

**AN: Once again, thank you all for being so patient, understanding, positive, and encouraging. There are times that I get frustrated with having no ideas and energy after classes to do what I love so much, which is writing, but you guys make it worth it. So after this chapter, something pretty major is going to happen (thanks to one of my most amazing followers). **

_It's nothing you prepare for, it's nothing that you plan. But love when this world lets you. Love while you can. _

_Night after night I sing these words and they continue to ring truer and truer each time I wake up next to the man I love. It's been a few weeks since I taped the interview of me spilling the beans about James and I and it's airing today, Walker's coming home today, Taye's going to be in the city today, I'm probably going to lose my mind today. _

"It's on." James said, peeking his head into the bedroom.

"I'll be there in a second."

James went back to the living room as Idina stood up from the bed and let out a nervous sigh. She didn't know whether she should keep her phone near her seeing as she was petrified of getting reactions from people who didn't know about their relationship. She finally got up and went into the living room. She was welcomed by James sitting on the couch and her face on the TV screen.

"Did I miss it? I hope I missed it." she said as she sat Indian style next to James.

James laughed as he placed his hand on her knee and gave it a little squeeze.

"You didn't miss it. And I wish you would stop being so nervous. Who cares what people say?"

Idina only sighed in response, but the fact that James wanted her to stop worrying really helped her. She grabbed his hand and let it rest in hers. They both watched, Idina getting more and more nervous because she knew it was coming up. When it did, they looked at one another and enjoyed a few minutes of silence before Idina's phone started chiming numerous times.

There were texts, a couple of calls, and countless Twitter notifications from young girls talking about "feels". James chose to leave his cellphone in the bedroom, which bothered Idina to no end.

"How can you be so calm?" she finally asked, tossing her phone onto the couch and laying her head on James' shoulder.

"I honestly don't care what people say. I love you and I want to be with you for the rest of my life." James said and suddenly Idina's eyes were looking straight into his when he looked down. "Nothing anyone says could ever change the way I feel about so I don't care what they say."

Idina could do nothing but smile. She was in the arms of the most amazing man in the world and there would be people who didn't like, there would be people who thought they weren't right for each other, there would be people doubting them, but when she looked at him, none of those people mattered. Not a single one. It was just him and her and all that mattered is that they were in this together.

Once James had calmed Idina down, she finally looked at her texts and notifications and saw that her phone was full of love. She got onto Twitter only to find out that there were people rooting for them before they even got together. They favorited some of their favorite tweets from their followers and laughed at the joking texts from their castmates.

As the day progressed, Idina started feeling better and better and she felt like a huge weight was lifted off of her chest. She went to her apartment and cleared her mind just in time because the most important person in her life was about to be with her and he deserved every ounce of her undivided attention.

She couldn't have scooped Walker up into her any faster when she opened the door and saw his smiling face. To her surprise, she felt better than usual after people knew about her relationship with James. Taye didn't see the interview, but he did tell her that people keep asking him how he feels on social networks.

Taye got up, taking a break from Walker and his toy dinosaurs.

"The divorce judgment's been signed and dated. So…it's final." Idina said and of course, she didn't sound happy because it wasn't a happy situation.

"Yeah, I know. I guess you two chose a good time to make that announcement today."

"That wasn't planned. I did that interview weeks ago, Taye, and I didn't know even know it was final until I came home this morning."

Taye only looked at her. She didn't want things to be awkward, but surely he knew that she stayed with James and James stayed with her sometimes. Walker had even talked with the two of them while they were at James'. This was far from an ideal situation, but it's the cards they were dealt and they were dealing with it the best they could.

"How are things going with you two anyway?" Taye asked.

"Really good." Idina said, trying not to seem arrogant, but she couldn't hold back her smile.

It was obvious from the glow in her eyes and the smile on her face that things really were going good and she was happy. Although it was no longer Taye making her happy, it pleased him to see her that way. He knew she deserved all the happiness in the world and if anything could take away any hurt he had ever caused her, he would support it 100%.

"Cara and the boys flew in a couple of weeks ago and we all went and had dinner with my parents. They love James." Idina stopped before she went any further and Taye could feel the tension.

"You don't have to keep how happy you are to yourself." he said, laughing to show her that he was okay. "If your family loves him, that's great."

Idina looked down to the floor and caught a visibly tired Walker yawning and rubbing his eye.

"Someone has had a busy morning and needs a nap." Idina said, getting up from her seat on the couch.

"I don't need a nap." Walker said as he laid down on the floor.

"Come on. Let's get you into a bed and see how much you don't need a nap."

As soon as Idina picked Walker up, he rested his head on her shoulder and muttered something about being wide awake as he strained to keep his eyes open. She turned around when she heard a knock at the door.

"That's probably James." she said as she started walking towards the door.

"I'll get it. You try to get Walker to sleep." Taye offered, getting up out of his seat as Idina made her way to Walker's bedroom.

Once he opened the door, he and James greeted each other, both not wanting to make things uncomfortable, but once they started talking things were fine.

"Knowing Walker, Idina probably won't be able to leave the room until he falls asleep." Taye said, laughing.

James laughed, but his laugh got all tangled in nervousness before he spoke. Once he did speak, it was in a really hushed voice.

"How long are you going to be in the city?" he asked, moving closer to Taye.

Taye looked around, confused as to why James was being so secretive. "Uh, about a week."

"I need your help with something and I'm really hoping you're open to helping me."

"Okay…" Taye said, still confused about what James was talking about.

"This weekend, I'm going to—" James started, but stopped when Idina walked back into the living room.

"Hi." she said as James stood up. "What are you two talking about?"

"Nothing." Taye answered, standing up from his seat. "I was just about to leave. James, get my number from Dee so we can talk about something."

"Talk about what?" Idina asked.

"Have a good day, Idina." Taye said, opening the door and laughing before walking out.

Idina laughed. "What does he have to talk to you about?"

"Have a good day, Idina." James repeated after Taye, knowing he couldn't lie to her.

"Don't you try that." Idina said before she gave James a kiss.

**AN: Sorry for another short chapter. College is aggravating and tiring in case you didn't know! Lol! You all are truly the best for continuing to read this; it really means so much to me! I think I'm going to make Saturdays my update days once a week starting next week. Thanks again for all of your support and tell your friends to come check it out. Let's get to 100 followers on IG, guys! I LOVE U!**


	13. Chapter 13

**AN: Hi again! It's Saturday so that means UPDATE DAY! Yay! Hopefully, I'll be able to stick with this and ideas will come consistently and school won't mess up my brain. Lol! So…here we go!**

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"Walker isn't in the best mood so it may take a while for us to come over." James heard Idina say through the phone although he was only half-listening.

"That's fine. Take your time."

"Are you okay? You're acting weird." Idina observed.

"I'm fine. Take your time." James said, laughing at his stupidity after Idina did the same. "I mean I'm okay. You don't have to be in a hurry and if he doesn't feel like going anywhere, I could always just come over."

James had never been so nervous in his life aside from when Oliver was born. He almost slipped up while talking to Idina at least a million times. He couldn't seem to get his thoughts together and even while they were talking, his mind was in other thoughts. A knock at the door pulled him out of his own mind this time.

"Are you expecting company? We can just come over another day."

"Uh, no. I just ordered lunch and it just got here. I'll call you in a little bit, okay?"

"Alright."

James hung up before opening the door and mentally smacking himself in the face after remembering that he didn't even say goodbye to Idina.

"Come on in, Taye."

Taye walked in and took a look around. "I never imagined I would be here."

"I know, but I really wanted to talk with you before this weekend." James started as they sat down. "I've already talked to Idina's parents and I would never want you to be the last to know and I also need your help."

"What is it, man?"

"A couple of weeks ago, Cara and I went ring shopping for a ring for Idina."

"A ring?" Taye asked, wanting clarification for something he was sure he already knew.

"An engagement ring."

It got awkward. It got silent. It got awkwardly silent.

"Maybe it wasn't a good idea for me to tell you this." James said, even more nervous now.

"No, no. I'm glad you're telling me. I certainly wouldn't want to find out from a gossip site." Taye said as threw a glance at James and started laughing.

James couldn't be more confused. Was Taye angry? Happy? Certainly he wasn't happy. But James nervously chuckled, trying to wrap his head around whatever was going on.

"It's okay, James. I'm happy for you guys."

James let out a sigh of relief. A smile came over his face along with a little redness.

"I can tell that Idina's really happy, man, and that makes my son happy. They will always be my family and I want nothing but happiness for them both. I'll help in any way I can."

"Great. I could use some help talking to Walker and seeing how he would feel about it…I think."

"You think?" Taye questioned.

"I don't know if I should say anything. If she says no, it would be confusing for him."

"You think she's going to say no? I've seen you two together and she's going to say yes. Don't focus on the negative."

"That's what I'm usually telling her." James said, smiling and shaking his head, completely thrown off by how his nerves were taking over. "I keep going back and forth between ways to ask and where to ask and how to ask and when to—"

"Hey, man. Calm down."

James took a breath and could only laugh at himself.

"I swear I had to ask her like five times because she kept thinking I was playing a joke on her." Taye started, a smile spreading across his face as he recalled one of the happiest times of his life. "So I tried to do it when she least expected it. I just waited until we were in bed one night and she still didn't believe me. She wouldn't even look at the ring until she knew for sure that I was serious."

James laughed at how much that sounded like typical Idina.

"I just don't know. I feel like it's the right time, I feel like we're ready. But I don't want to push this on her or make her feel obligated to say yes." James explained.

"You know her as well as I do so you know that she's strong, independent, and has a mind of her own. You know that if it isn't something she wants to do, she won't do it."

James nodded his head, feeling much more confident and secure than he did just minutes ago.

"You're the last person I expected to help get my head on straight about this." James admitted.

"She's my family and you make her happy. That's all that matters."

For the remainder of the week, James tried his best to act as normal as possible. It also took a little work to make sure Walker didn't slip up and say anything, but for the most part, he was excited about keeping a secret from his mom.

Every night, James took the ring out of his nightstand's drawer, eyes focusing on the ring's gleaming cushion cut center diamond and diamond paved band. He felt like he and Cara did a great job, but he couldn't help but wonder if Idina would love it or not. He wondered if the wrong ring would ruin the whole moment. He wondered if she would say no if the ring wasn't up to par.

And every night, he had to push those thoughts away and remember that he was about to propose to the woman he loved, the woman he's had feelings for since the moment they started getting to know each other. He thought about how he was so thankful for that drunken kiss at Idina's apartment door because it had led to so much more. The positive thoughts definitely pushed the negative ones away in no time.

That Saturday came quicker than expected and James was jumpy all day. He had never been nervous on stage, during a show, but today was a different story. Idina even asked him if anything was wrong and of course, he said everything was okay. Everything really was okay other than the fact he felt like he was going to explode with excitement and nervousness at any moment.

He suggested a late dinner at a restaurant near Central Park and only got complaints from Idina about how tired she was, how she just wanted to go get Walker from Taye and go to bed, how she didn't feel like changing into better clothes. But all it took from James was a sweet look in the eye and an even sweeter kiss on the lips and she was sold.

After they enjoyed dinner, Idina was more awake and very easily gave into James' idea to take a walk. They talked and held hands and it felt like it had been forever since they had spent time like this. If they were tired, they definitely didn't show it. Idina was laughing and smiling like there was no tomorrow while James was about to burst loose at the seams.

"Okay, I think we should turn around. I'm not really in the mood to tackle a million steps." Idina said as she stood next to James, standing on the Bethesda Terrace, both of their eyes focused on the beautiful fountain down in front of them.

James let out a laugh. "You're exaggerating."

"Come on." she said, trying to pull James away with her.

"No. You come on." James said as he softly pulled her towards the top of the steps. "We'll be down there in no time."

Once they were walking down the steps, Idina was happy to spend more time with James, happy to be out with one another and talk more. They walked over to the center arch right beneath the terrace and faced the fountain.

"I wish we had more time to do things like this. It really does feel wonderful." Idina said, giving James a confused look when he let go of her hand and stood right in front of her, essentially blocking her stunning view of the fountain.

He knelt down and if he hadn't been looking straight into her eyes, she would've sworn he was about to tie his shoe. She didn't want to get her hopes up so she didn't react until she saw him pull a small box out of his light coat's pocket. Her face instantly lit up when she saw the giant smile on James' face.

"Oh, my God." Idina said, tears welling up in her eyes quicker than she expected and she shook her head out of disbelief, but it was obviously misinterpreted by James in his nervous state.

"No? Get up?" he quickly asked.

"No. Keep going." Idina said, laughing and covering her mouth with her hands, which made James smile even bigger at how adorable and shocked she looked.

"I really didn't plan what to say. This is as far as my thoughts would let me get." James admitted, still smiling. "But, I have never been so sure of anything in my life. Even before we started dating, I wanted this with you. I wanted this amazing moment and so many more."

Idina nodded her head while biting her lip, trying extremely hard not to start bawling and little did she know James was fighting that very same battle.

"You are the strongest, most talented, and most genuine and caring person I've had the pleasure of knowing and you only make me better. We have both been hurt and we've both had our trust broken, but we gave each other a chance and I want to take that chance with you every single day for the rest of my life."

Hearing what James was saying and seeing him down on his knee, holding that box with that beautiful fountain behind him, Idina couldn't hold it back anymore and the tears started rolling down her face one after another. This made James a little weak and tears formed in his eyes as well.

"I want to make you as happy as you are right now every day. Forever. And…I want it really bad." James added, laughing.

Idina laughed and wiped the tears from her face.

"Will you marry me, Idina?" he finally asked.

Idina, chewing on her bottom lip, tried to compose herself as she nodded her head. "Yes. Yes." she said, smiling, and crying more.

James took the ring from the box before placing the box back into his pocket. He took Idina's left hand into his and slid the ring on and it was perfect. They were perfect. James stood up and placed his hands on Idina's waist, pulling her flush against him and kissing her.

"I love you so much." Idina said, her lips still touching his as she spoke.

"I love you, too."

She placed her arms around his shoulders and clasped her hands together behind his head. They kissed and they swayed as if music was playing. She felt so comfortable in his arms and there was no way she would've said no. That answer would never even cross her mind. This was a one of a kind man and she wouldn't pass that up no matter how much she'd been hurt in the past.

Whenever they took a break from kissing to breathe, there was an exchange of "I love you." The routine seemed like it was repeated a million times before they finally walked back up the terrace, Idina's eyes going back and forth between the new addition on her finger and James' grinning face. They got a cab and went to James' apartment and made love all night.

Things felt different when they made love that night. It was better if that was possible, they felt closer, they felt like one, and they felt like they were residing in the greatest place in existence: each other's presence.

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**AN: I mean….I may or may not have teared up while writing this chapter. I am so grateful to have gotten these two to this point, but I really owe it to all of you. Every single review, comment, like, fave, message, and tweet meant the absolute world to me. You guys think we should keep going through the journey of wedding planning, families meeting, moving in together, wedding, maybe a baby? This could go on forever! Haha! Thanks for all of the encouragement, guys! See you next week! I LOVE U!**


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